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We feel like we should be extra fair to Greg Gutfeld, because he said this bozo shit on Fox News’s “The Five” before last night’s scoops started to come out about Merrick Garland’s Justice Department personally criminally investigating Donald Trump. And it was before the Maggie Haberman story about all the BUT HER EMAILS from Trump’s campaign, where they openly discussed their fake elector scheme to steal the election from America and give it to Trump.
MORE! Trump Campaign Lawyers Were Takin’ ALL The Notes On Their Motherf*ckin’ Conspiracy
All Greggles had in front of him when he said this bozo shit was the January 6 hearings themselves, which have been such a dud. You know, unless you’re a normal person. In that case, they’ve been explosive, and there’s even evidence they’ve been changing some Republican minds.
MORE MORE! The Five Acts Of The January 6 Hearings Season Finale!
Tell us how the former president’s anal opening smells like roses, Greg.
GREG GUTFELD (HOST): But the discontent, the discontent is getting louder because January 6th floundered.
Did it?
It ended up accidentally exonerating Trump.
Did it?
They showed no planned coup, no criminality —
Have they not?
they had to move the goalposts into the parking lot.
Did they?
Now it’s like, oh, he took too long.
Is that what it’s like?
Fine. Why is it that he seems more electable now?
Is that what he seems?
Is it because the public saw that it was a show trial and that they didn’t sympathize?
Is that what happened?
They actually sympathized with the other side, with Congress, they just saw them as a bunch of drama queens?
Did they?
So this is a teachable moment. You know, when Trump looks better than Biden after three weeks of nonstop political agitprop, then that says something about your candidate. The guy’s less popular than chronic halitosis. He stinks.
Whatever we need to say to ourselves and to our geriatric white bread white loser afternoon Fox News viewers while they gum on whatever the senior home is serving for 3 p.m. dinner that day.
We guess this is what the Fox News viewers demand now, just somebody to feed their dog brains fact-free kibbles to make them feel better about their Dear Leader. Come to think of it, that’s what Fox News viewers demanded yesterday and the day before that and the day before that and the day before that and so on and so forth.
And we guess this is just what Greg Gutfeld’s tender brain needs to hear out of Greg Gutfeld’s mouth, to get him through his day.
Greg Gutfeld is a fucking moron, that’s what we wrote this blog post to say.
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