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When Marjorie Taylor Greene isn’t getting openly jeered and mocked by her peers, she likes to make baseless, fact-free accusations during congressional hearings that Democratic Rep. Eric Swalwell got caught fucking a Chinese spy. Amid all the Fox News conspiracy theories about the time a Chinese spy named Fang Fang tried to get close to Swalwell and a number of other California politicians, there was never an actual credible allegation that Swalwell had gotten caught fucking a Chinese spy. It was just the thing Republicans were insinuating, if you caught their drift, and they hoped you did.
But Greene, because she’s a human incarnation of a wet armpit fart whose parents clearly didn’t raise her well, just says it out loud.
Swalwell has been an understandable target for Republicans, because he has been an outspoken participant in congressional investigations into whether Republicans’ indicted, twice-impeached third-grade-level-speaking lord and savior is a literal actual traitor. It’s deflection and projection. They desperately need Democrats to be compromised.
Adam Schiff did a bunch of lies or something! Hillary Clinton stole the election from herself to frame Trump for Russia, Russia, Russia! Joe Biden did THING in COUNTRY for PERSON!
Hunter Biden GOT LAID! USED PENIS!
Eric Swalwell GOT LAID! ALSO PENIS!
As we said, Republicans mostly just like to insinuate these things about Swalwell. They’re just asking questions! Oh yeah, and big man House Speaker Kevin McCarthy kicked Swalwell and Schiff off the Intelligence Committee, in part citing these laughable accusations, because he is a spiteful priss. He pretended he knew something we did not. Adam Schiff reminded McCarthy that he was in that FBI briefing too, you dumbass.
But surely Greene’s classless face will stop saying those things about Swalwell in congressional hearings, now that the House Ethics Committee, which is now led by Republicans, has dropped its two-year investigation into Swalwell, on account of “nothing fucking there.” Right? Surely she wouldn’t keep lying, like some kind of lying hunk of sun-dried dogshit?
LOL.
But anyway, that’s the news.
In a letter to Swalwell dated Monday, the committee said it will take no further action in the probe that began in April 2021 into “allegations raised in the complaint that you may have violated House Rules, laws, or other standards of conduct in connection with your interactions with Ms. Christine Fang,” the suspected Chinese spy.
In his statement responding to TOTAL EXONERATION, Swalwell simply said what he’s said all along, that when these suspicions about a campaign volunteer were brought to his attention 10 years ago, he did everything he could to help law enforcement, and that nobody, including Republican speakers John Boehner and Paul Ryan, had ever questioned it. (Implied: until it was politically expedient for clowns running interference for a president who actually was compromised.)
Marjorie Taylor Greene shut her fucking face now?
Her best silver-fox boy Kevin McCarthy let Swalwell back on the Intel committee now?
And we bet Sean Hannity or somebody else on Fox News will do a special hour-long program apologizing for all the hours they’ve spent lying about Eric Swalwell, yeah?
If those people had one ounce of integrity, they would do those things.
But they don’t, so fuck it.
Fox News’s headline on this story? “Ethics committee warns Swalwell as investigation into interactions with Chinese woman closes.”
As we were saying about ounces of integrity and lacks thereof.
FURTHER READING:
Eric Swalwell: He Bang With Chinese Spy?
Kevin McCarthy Desperately Hopes You Believe Sh*t He’s Making Up About Eric Swalwell
Hakeem Jeffries To Kevin McCarthy: Wanna Fight About Adam Schiff And Eric Swalwell? Let’s Go.
Adam Schiff Reminds That Twit Kevin McCarthy That He Got FBI’s Eric Swalwell Briefing Too
Big Man Kevin McCarthy Kicks Schiff And Swalwell Off Intel Committee, BIG MAN!
[NBC News]
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