Wonkette’s News of Today is DID YOU MISS US?

I mean just the afternoon newsletter roundup, which now that I think about it I could have sent out each morning last week while we were at the DNC for our posts from the day before. Oh well, I will be sure to do that in 2028!

What have we made for you today?

Evan, as is his Monday night duty (Mondays are my day off), did your tabs! They were a good set of tabs!

The Five Kennedys Most Likely To Take RFK Jr.’s Calls (Number Four Is NOPE). Tabs, Tues., Aug. 27, 2024

Knock Gary over with a feather!

Waaait A Minute, You’re Telling Us The Trump Campaign Is A GRIFT?

Robyn has some theories!

QAnon Prophet: Trump To Get Endorsement From Dead Celebrity Of Some Sort

Crip Dyke gives you the good news from Arizona, the bad news from the rest of it.

Weirdo States Want In Trans Drivers’ Pants

Dok did three, count them three, policy stories I wanted today! HERO.

Trump Judge Blocks Biden From Letting Sandwich Shop Workers Change Jobs

and

Federal Judge Tells Undocumented Spouses Of US Citizens To GTFO

and

Biden-Harris Administration Sues Pants Off Price-Fixing App That Keeps The Rent Too Damn High

Evan did three, count them three, stories on these fucking idiots!

Jack Smith Officially Asks 11th Circuit To Hand Judge Aileen Cannon Her Ass Again

and

Is Trump Buying Ads In South Florida Just So Baby Can See Himself On TV?

and OH NOOOOOOO. When you’ve lost Judge Boxwine, you’re a real piece of shit.

Oh, Just Jesse Watters Making Jokes About Generals ‘Having Their Way’ With Kamala Harris

and that’s it for us today, we’ll see you bright and early for MOAR TABS! 😀