Wonkette News Of Today: GOOD NEWS! (Tiny print: and some Supreme Court)

FIRST AND MOST IMPORTANTLY! Did you already clip and print and send this to your grandchildren with the traditional $5 check?

Clip And Send To Your Great Grandchildren: Joe Biden Is Kicking Ass On Climate Change!

Then you deserve a drink!

Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week’s Cocktail, Hooper’s Dark and Stormy!

There were some tabs! They were good tabs!

Renewable Energy Killed Your Asthma! Tabs, Fri., June 14, 2024

Not A Cult wants to name the very oceans after Senor Cabeza Malo.

Mercury, Venus, Trump And Mars. These Are The Planets That Dwell By Our Star.

This by Robyn was *very* good!

Chick-Fil-A’s Summer Camp Of Horrors Is Here To Teach Your Kids How To Wage Slave!

This too also, Robyn, good!

Sen. Mike Lee Just Lying To Your Face About IVF And Abortion Travel Restrictions

Matilda, your salts!

Sugar Daddy Harlan Crow Reveals Even More Private Jet Flights He Gave Clarence Thomas

I simply would not shit on the city that is hosting my convention in the state that I very much need to win.

In Which Donald Trump Sh*ts On Milwaukee, Host Of The Republican National Convention

GAAAAAH FUCK.

Supreme Court, Nostalgic For Las Vegas Massacre, Rules Bump Stocks Perfectly Cromulent

Only nine posts today? Well that was easy! Pop by over the weekend and see what we’re dicking around with then! (NB we will be off on Wednesday for Juneteenth! YAY Juneteenth! I hope you’re off too!)