Remember how Tim Scott is running for president? Well, I do, and it’s my job to remind everyone. Scott launched his exploratory campaign last month with a video that insulted our ancestors, but since then, his campaign hasn’t exactly caught fire. He currently enjoys six percent support in the Republican primary, but only if you combine his actual two percent average with fellow South Carolinian Nikki Haley’s four percent.
While focus testing his message at all the predictable spots — Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina — he keeps mentioning May 22 as the day to watch and tell your friends about, as if he’s starting a podcast. That’s when he’ll give a “big announcement” at his alma mater, Charleston Southern University. See, he’s reached a conclusion about his presidential run, but it seems like it’s not the reasonable conclusion one would make after reviewing his dismal polling and observing the public’s overall lack of interest.
“I believe this so thoroughly that it is time to take the Faith in America Tour, not just on the road and not just an exploratory committee, but it is time to make the final step,” Scott said. “It is time we win back America for our conservative cause.”
Zzzzzz …. Sorry, I dozed off. Can we just skip to the part where he’s evil?
PREVIOUSLY:
LOL! Tim Scott … LOL! … Running For POTUS … LOL! No, Seriously!
Tim Scott Prepares For ‘Please Clap’ Presidential Run
Anyway, Scott is most likely the only sitting Republican senator who’s going to humiliate themselves against Donald Trump. Tom Cotton spared the 2024 election his relentless charisma, Josh Hawley probably wants to have a few more insurrections under his belt before launching a presidential campaign, and neither of the 2016 also-rans, Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, are getting involved. But while his Senate colleagues just adore Scott and describe him as “terrific,” “top-tier” and “engaging,” they’re not rushing to endorse him.
“He’s extraordinarily bright, well-informed, and inspiring,” said Susan Collins, who apparently inspires easily. “I think Tim is among the strongest candidates. I would also put in that category Nikki Haley, potentially Glenn Youngkin, and Chris Christie. I think we’re blessed to have a lot of good people. […] I’m not endorsing anyone at this point; I think it’s way too early. But I am a big Tim Scott fan.”
Ted Cruz is also “a big fan of Tim” and insists Scott is a “good friend,” although there’s no documented evidence that Cruz has friends. However, Cruz is “staying out of the race,” which is otherwise good news for America, but he’s “confident that the voters will decide and make the choice” and he looks forward to “enthusiastically supporting the Republican nominee in 2024.” Scott obviously didn’t insult Cruz’s wife sufficiently to seal the deal.
You might recall that Scott endorsed Marco Rubio early on in 2016, claiming Rubio was the “best shot” at defeating the dreaded Hillary Beast. When asked if he’d return the favor, Rubio said, “We’ll see,” as if his endorsement is similar to taking his kids out for ice cream.
Mitt Romney said that Scott is “someone who I would be happy if he became president of the United States,” but he added, “There are a number of people who I feel that way about; he’s certainly one of them.” What a ringing non-endorsement: Of all the Republican candidates who aren’t twice-impeached, recently indicted, sexual abusers, Tim Scott is certainly “one of them.”
It was tough enough running against frontrunner Trump in 2016 when he was an outsider candidate. Now, he’s running as the de facto incumbent with unwavering MAGA devotion and significant support from what remains of the party mainstream. He’s already secured the endorsement of almost 50 House members and 10 senators. That number will probably only increase now that a jury has found him liable for sexual abuse and defamation.
Kevin Cramer from North Dakota raved over Scott so much it was embarrassing: “He’s top-tier, that’s for sure,” Cramer said. “He’s smart, hard-working. He’s articulate. He’s joyful. He’s just the best. He’s always a sort of healing source when he’s around.”
He’s like Bagger Vance and the big guy from The Green Mile all at once!
“I’d absolutely consider endorsing him,” Cramer said. “He’s got everything you’d want in a leader.” But when asked if Scott could actually beat Trump, Cramer didn’t seem to think he’s magical enough.
“I don’t know,” Cramer said. “It’s hard to say and it’s hard to see it.”
Maybe Scott should just find something else to do on May 22.
Follow Stephen Robinson on Twitter if it still exists.
Catch SER on his new podcast, The Play Typer Guy.
Did you know SER has his own YouTube Channel? Well, now you do, so go subscribe right now!
Click the widget to keep your Wonkette ad-free and feisty.