[ad_1]
Donald Trump is upset. (It’s becoming a daily occurrence in his increasingly failed second term, keep it up, America!)
He’s at the NATO summit in The Netherlands, but back in the United States, the fake news is committing horrible crimes against him, reporting that his own intelligence community says the little bombs he hit Iran’s nuclear sites with didn’t quiiiiiiiite take out the Iranian nuclear program, and that far from destroying it, they set it back by … months? Sure, let’s say months.
Wow, would that be the same so-called intelligence community run by Tulsi Gabbard, the one that said Iran couldn’t even make a nuclear bomb in two weeks or less with pipe cleaners and vanilla frosting and whatever else they found in the garage?
Because fuck what she says, who the fuck hired her anyway, who the fuck she think she is, the director of national intelligence or something? Donald Trump knows that the so-called “his intelligence community” is a Deep State plot to remove him from the love of the quarterback of the football team OF HIS HEART, Vladimir Putin, and he won’t have it.
Also saying Trump’s little bunker busters might not have, um, penetrated, that is a direct attack on his manhood, and also we guess Defense Secretary Pete “Secretary Shitfaced” Hegseth’s manhood, but mostly his.
CNN notes that the assessment from the so-called Defense so-called Intelligence so-called Agency (scDscIscA) is very different from Trump’s babbling claims since the strikes that Iran’s nuclear facilities had been “completely and totally obliterated.” Shitfaced has also been saying “obliterated,” they’ve all been saying it, it’s a new word everybody’s been saying since Dear Leader invented it probably.
Two of the people familiar with the assessment said Iran’s stockpile of enriched uranium was not destroyed. One of the people said the centrifuges are largely “intact.” Another source said that the intelligence assessed enriched uranium was moved out of the sites prior to the US strikes.
“So the (DIA) assessment is that the US set them back maybe a few months, tops,” this person added.
“Intact”? “INTACT”?
Time for Trump to send out the most servile, brain-damaged, know-nothing idiots in his entire administration — the ones with the least self-respect — to say laughably clownfucking stupid things that will soothe Daddy’s wounded ego!
North Korean News Lady Birth Of A Nation Nazi, activate!
The full text there:
“This alleged assessment is flat-out wrong and was classified as ‘top secret’ but was still leaked to CNN by an anonymous, low-level loser in the intelligence community. The leaking of this alleged assessment is a clear attempt to demean President Trump, and discredit the brave fighter pilots who conducted a perfectly executed mission to obliterate Iran’s nuclear program. Everyone knows what happens when you drop fourteen 30,000 pound bombs perfectly on their targets: total obliteration.”
Everybody knows it, you idiots! Everybody knows bunky busters bust bunkies!
This so-called assessment is alleged and also wrong and also top secret and leaked by a loser! Alleged leaker assessment! Assessed alleged leaker!
As if!
LOL, what a mewling fucking child. Did her husband-we-mean-grandfather-we-mean-husband teach her to lie like this? We are just asking.
Speaking of mewling fucking children who are absolute embarrassments to their God and their country, Secretary Shitfaced is out with a statement that SHUT UP it was too “obliterated!” and the strike was perfect and if you call Pete Hegseth’s dad WHOM HE WORSHIPS a pussy one more time he’s gonna beat the shit out of you after school HUFF PUFF! HUFF PUFF! (Dad’s still probably gonna beat the shit out of him when he gets home, for fucking up these strikes.)
Steve Witkoff, Trump’s Middle East Envoy/Putin dicklicker when Trump is too busy licking other dictator dicks and needs a pinch-hitter, he went out to blab “OBLITERATED!” to Laura Ingraham on Fox News last night.
They did 12 BUNKER BUSTERS! There’s NO DOUBT! That it BREACHED! The CANOPY!
Something something OBLITERATED!
So Steve Witkoff sounds just as much like a whiny 17-year-old disappointment as Karoline Leavitt does. Also funny how all these stupid fucking morons are staking their entire professional reputations — such as they are — on something so easily disproven.
But oh well, such is the cost of debasing yourself daily for such an emotionally stunted and easily upset crybaby pussy ass bitch of a Dear Leader day after day after day after day after day.
You’ll note that the Witkoff appearance on Ingraham is Trump’s “Pinned Truth” on Truth Social, because he really needs you to see it. (More like needs himself to see it. As if Truth Social is the place where people “see things.” Pfffft.)
If you want to see the full extent of Grandpa’s crybaby temper tantrum, Truth Social is where to go. We’re not going to reproduce a bunch of his posts, but suffice it to say that he’s really blubbering and crying about this. Here’s but one example:
They are DEMEANING his strikes the way he or Pete Hegseth might do to a common woman!
Yeah, it’s really stinging him for everyone to be out there saying his bunker busters don’t quite hit the cervix we mean target. Everybody is required to go out and say Trump’s bunker busters are big and hard and DEFINITELY NOT weirdly shaped like Mario Kart characters or dwarfed by impassable thatches of kudzu.
Hit CNN for a full picture of where the assessment of these strikes really is, as well as quotes from people like Democratic Rep. Pat Ryan on why they’ve suddenly canceled congressional briefings on them:
Democratic Rep. Pat Ryan of New York said on X on Tuesday that “Trump just cancelled a classified House briefing on the Iran strikes with zero explanation. The real reason? He claims he destroyed ‘all nuclear facilities and capability;’ his team knows they can’t back up his bluster and BS.”
And so forth.
Again, Trump is at NATO yesterday and today, where he’s worried he’s going to look stupid and weak among his peers. Spoiler, but according to this “family photo” of all the world leaders at the NATO summit last night, his tacky “How did a used car salesman get into a meeting of world leaders” blue suit that looks like his mom bought it for him at TJ Maxx done already took care of making him look stupid and weak among his peers. (Would you look at Queen Máxima, though? Exquisite.)
So yeeeeeeeah. Whose touchdown strike was actually more like a second down with nine yards still to go? Who moved on those Iranian bunkers like a bitch and took them furniture shopping but couldn’t get there?
Well, technically it’s Secretary Shitfaced AKA Major Drunk AKA Whiskey Pete who apparently whiskey-dicked the strike, since that out-of-his-league asslicker is technically in charge of the Pentagon.
But let’s be real here, ain’t nobody think that guy is actually overseeing or precision-guiding shit. (Do missile launches require a Breathalyzer? Just asking.)
No, the buck stops with Trump. And everybody knows it.
Sounds like the only thing getting TOTALLY OBLITERATED here is any remaining vestige of a myth that these fucking losers are remotely able to perform when it counts.
[CNN]
Evan has a side project called The Moral High Ground, you should check it out and subscribe there too!
Follow Evan Hurst on BlueSky!
Are you guys on Instagram? Let’s get that going.
Follow Evan on Facebook.
[ad_2]
Original Source Link
