Oh No Did We Miss The Great Rightwing Froot Loops Boycott Already?

In their never-ending search for things to be mad about, the Very Online Right may have found their newest target, according to a story today in LGBTQ Nation, which says,

Conservatives on social media are calling for a boycott of Froot Loops and parent company Kellogg’s over a promotion in Canada offering free access to an online library of equity, diversity, and inclusion content.

Now that the Right has taught Bud Light its lesson, it seems like good timing.

Or maybe the outrage already flared and burned itself out, since the story is based on a Newsweek piece from November 20 about a Xitter post by the wingnut account “End Wokeness” the day before, which warned that “Fruit [sic] Loops is now encouraging kids to go online and read their free library of woke propaganda,” with photos of a terrifying CGI Toucan Sam holding a little book announcing in English and French that the box includes a link to a “free digital library” of books with “Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion content.” (Folks who actually have a cereal box can “unlock” even more content, which is no doubt porn.)

The ever-vile “Libs of TikTok” piled on with a November 19 Squeet claiming that Kelloggs “wants to indoctrinate your children with breakfast cereal. Stop giving them your money!” This might be difficult for Kelloggs to do since the cereal appears to be a Canada-only item, but what if you innocently went shopping in Windsor and then drove back over the bridge to Detroit with filthy bilingual woke cereal?

The actual site, a production of Kelloggs and its nonprofit partners Kids Can Press and BCG Canada, sure is offensive, maybe, offering English and French versions of a selection of kids’ books like Maggie’s Chopsticks, a sweet little story about a girl who gets her first Very Own chopsticks and then everyone in the family tries to tell her how to use them, a bit absurdly, but it All Works Out.

Oh, yes, and that New York Post story points out that BCG Canada used to be “Boys & Girls Clubs of Canada,” leaving the reader to be outraged at the triumph of woke gender ideology stealing the boys and girls.

There’s also My Words Flew Away Like Birds, about a girl whose family moves to a new country (probably Canada, even!) and she forgets the few words of English her parents taught her, but it All Works Out. (Crucially, the book doesn’t even say whether her parents immigrated legally, so wingnuts should assume not.)

Another of these horrible woke books that you’d really have to work hard at being offended by is My City Speaks, about a blind girl whose dad takes her around the city and she hears how neat it all is. Maybe it’s offensive because the girl and her dad have brown skin. Unfortunately, at the risk of out-woking Froot Loops and its NGO partners, the inclusion of this book points up a real flaw in the site: Ain’t no audio version or even, as far as we can tell, alt-text for readers who use adaptive tech. (If there is, the site doesn’t call attention to it.)

And as LGBTQ Nation notes, despite that terribly offensive rainbow on Toucan Sam’s beak, the site doesn’t appear to have any specific LGBTQ+ content. Still, there are lots of nonwhite people in these books, and not a single one about Jesus, so it’s clearly part of International Jewry’s white genocide project or something.

So how’s that boycott going? Darned if we can tell, the original late-November Xweets certainly resulted in some resqueets and a handful of stories in rightwing media (New York Post headline: “Cereal Killers: Why conservatives want to ban ‘woke’ Froot Loops”). But while the story made it to OAN in an undated video (very professional, guys), Fox News, the big daddy of manufactured rightwing outrage, appears to have given it a pass. This simply doesn’t seem to have blown up in the wingnuttosphere like the 2021 Pride Froot Loops did.

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It’s hard to predict how the social media moral panic machine will evolve culture wars crap like this; the only recent Xweets we found in a search on the site today were reactions to the LGBTQ Nation story, mocking the very idea of boycotting Froot Loops. Crom knows the reminder may catch rightwing attention this time around and we’ll get some congressional hearings into why a South American jungle bird would be eating sugary cereal in the first place. Or maybe some shopper will see a transgender reindeer, who the fuck even knows anymore?

Libs of TikTok is mad today about, uh, a dancing flower at the White House, and one of the dancers is a MAN, and maybe it’s a GAYFLOWER, so why is Joe Biden trying to groom kids to be Sugar Plum Fairies? WHY OH MY GOD WHY??? AMERICA IS OVER. the end.

Update: Yes, this is your OPEN THREAD

Happy Xmas! President Kid Rock Announces War On Bud Light Is Over!

Good Lord, The One Million Moms Are Still So Mad At Cereal

[Newsweek / LGBTQ Nation / Kelloggs-BGC Canada]

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