Nikki Haley’s very real presidential run is going well. At her campaign announcement party, extremist rabid-right-wing hate pastor John Hagee delivered the prayer. Remember Hagee? He said Hurricane Katrina was God’s judgment on New Orleans for gayness. Tim Miller notes that he organized the Wallace Youth for George Wallace in 1968 and then in 2003 said the antichrist would be a “homosexual” and “partially Jewish” like Hitler. During the Haley kickoff rally, she said she wanted to be John Hagee when she grows up. So she’s definitely the moderate and sensible choice in the Republican primary.
And since she’s in the Republican primary, that means she’s running against Donald Trump, so she might have some reasons to give for why she’d be better at being president, yeah?
You betcha!
Last night on “Hannity,” the host gave Haley an opportunity to just say where she and Trump “differ.” Gentle question! Even with an opponent as thin-skinned as Trump, she could have said something. Instead she said “new generational leadership” and a bunch of other shit that was decidedly not something. She said there should be “competency tests” for any official who’s over 75, which some people noticed because Donald Trump is 76. Of course, Joe Biden will be 649 at the time of the next election, so he’s part of that too. We bet that’ll go over real well with the old balls Republicans in Florida that any GOP candidate needs to win.
There was also some fearmongering about how Americans shouldn’t have to having staring contests with Chinese spy balloons, we dunno. But nothing about how she “differs” with Trump.
And then he asked her again. Gently! Nothing. Instead she said, “I don’t kick sideways. I’m kicking forward. Joe Biden is the president. He’s the one I’m running against. What I’m saying is that you don’t have to be 80 years old to be president.” Except for how — and this might be news to her — she’s actually running against Trump. If she wants to run against Biden, she has to run against Trump first.
“We’re in this to win it,” said the candidate we absolutely do not believe is in it to win it, but may be in it to leapfrog Marjorie Taylor Greene and Kari Lake as Trump’s veep picks. We’d buy that.
This morning on “Fox & Friends,” Haley repeated the “kicking sideways” line, showing that it’s something she’s practiced and not an off-the-cuff thing she said on “Hannity.” It’s the thing she’s going to say when somebody asks her to explain why a Republican primary voter should pick her and not Trump.
And then! Brian Kilmeade asked Haley about her semi-sort-of-mean line about candidates over 75 being required to take competency tests, and asked how Trump would do today on that dementia test he always brags about acing, the one where he correctly identified “camel” and remembered “Person. Woman. Man. Camera. TV.”
And Haley said he’d probably ace it again!
Which totally defanged her one line.
So pathetic. Like, what the hell is this even?
The thing Wonkette has been sayingsince the beginning, since Haley was being lauded for taking down those confederate monuments as governor of South Carolina, is that she is a coward.
That’s aged well.
Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter right here!
And once that doesn’t exist, I’m also giving things a go at the Mastodon (@evanhurst@newsie.social) and at Post!
Have you heard that Wonkette DOES NOT EXIST without your donations? Please hear it now, and if you have ever enjoyed a Wonkette article, throw us some bucks, or better yet, SUBSCRIBE!
