All the conspiracy theories are flying, and some of them are more fun than others. Also some of them are dumber than others.
Let’s take a visit with known anti-vax lunatic Robert F. Kennedy Jr. — last seen in these pages babbling to Tucker Carlson Russian propaganda that Tucker Carlson had told him only the week before, back in the olden days when Tucker had a job — and see which conspiracy theory he is yapping out of his stupid facehole.
Surprise, it is the stupidest one of all, that Big Pharma and Pfizer did it! We are all very surprised that RFK Jr. picked that one.
Fox fires @TuckerCarlson five days after he crosses the red line by acknowledging that the TV networks pushed a deadly and ineffective vaccine to please their Pharma advertisers.
Hahahahahahahaha maybe RFK Jr. has been living in Vladimir Putin’s asshole since the beginning of the pandemic or something, unable to tune the receivers on his tinfoil hat to get Tucker’s show, but the stupidest part of this is the notion that Tucker FINALLY spoke out against the vaccine.
Like he wasn’t doing it all these times:
This Vaccine Disinfo Is Wildly Disgusting, Even For Tucker And Charlie Kirk
Vile And Unrepentant Tucker Carlson Now Telling Your Nana COVID Vaccines Kill
TUCKER NOT MAD AT VACCINATED NEW YORK GOVERNOR, TUCKER LAUGHING AT HER!
Tucker Carlson: Encouraging COVID Vaccinations Is First Step Towards Forced Sterilization
Tucker Willing To Judge Them Swollen Balls For Himself
We recognize that last headline could refer to just about any show Tucker ever did, but it was about Nikki Minaj’s Cousin’s Friend’s Testicles, what had become too large on the Goldilocks scale due to the COVID vaccine. Allegedly.
Anyway, that was just a few times Tucker had MIKE PENCE’S COURAGE to talk about vaccines.
We guess RFK Jr. missed those.
Carlson’s breathtakingly courageous April 19 monologue broke TV’s two biggest rules: Tucker told the truth about how greedy Pharma advertisers controlled TV news content and he lambasted obsequious newscasters for promoting jabs they knew to be lethal and worthless. For many years, Tucker has had the nation’s biggest audience averaging 3.5 million — 10 times the size of CNN. Fox just demonstrated the terrifying power of Big Pharma.
LOL, stupid dumbass babbling piece of actual shit. We would respond to more of his words individually, but literally nothing else he says matters when he’s acting like Tucker just spoke out against vaccines last week for the first time.
Go fuck yourself, you brain-addled clown.
Anyway, all the vilest, worst Americans God ever created are so desperate for Robert F. Kennedy Jr. running for president to be a thing, so desperate to believe Democratic voters are so stupid that we don’t know that Robert F. Kennedy Jr. doesn’t actually deserve to be able to use his name in public. Apparently his presidential run is Steve Bannon’s little project. Marjorie Taylor Greene has been on Twitter trying to convince Democrats they’re being cheated because the DNC won’t allow debates between Joe Biden and totally real presidential candidate RFK Jr.
You know, all the grassroots Democrats.
LMAO you betcha.
Here’s a pic of RFK Jr. that was making the rounds on Twitter last night.
OH FOR SURE.
You know you’ve got a real Democratic primary going when the spoiler candidate is showing up in pictures with such stars of the Donald Trump Russian election-stealing scandal as Roger Stone and Michael Flynn. Shit, those guys did literal actual crimes in service of the project! (They were obviously framed, obviously. That’s why innocent and pure Donald Trump saw it in his heart to pardon them, same way he pardoned Paul Manafort. Ayup.)
Which one is slipping the checks from Putin in his pocket?
You know, allegedly.
Follow Evan Hurst on Twitter right here
And once that doesn’t exist, I’m also giving things a go at the Mastodon (@evanhurst@newsie.social) and at Post!
Have you heard that Wonkette DOES NOT EXIST without your donations? Please hear it now, and if you have ever enjoyed a Wonkette article, throw us some bucks, or better yet, SUBSCRIBE!