Knock Wonkette Down And It Is Up Again!

Hi friends we were down for a couple hours there today and you know what? I didn’t even stress about it. If the site’s gonna go down, 4 or so on Friday seems like a fine time for that!

Here’s today’s stories!

There were tabs! It had a picture of my bar shelf! (“Bar shelf” is a thing now. Who knew? Apparently I did it, by magic.)

10 Beautiful Bar Shelf Ideas To Raise A Glass To! Tabs, Fri., March 15, 2024

Evan did a Wonkvestigation into Fundie Baby Voice. Spoiler: He’s against it!

Weird How Katie Britt Turns Off Her Fundie Baby Voice When She’s Just Blabbing On Ted Cruz’s Podcast

Nice Time!

Social Security Chief Martin O’Malley Decides To Get Agency Out Of The Life-Ruining Business

:/

Picture It: A TikTok Full of Steve Mnuchin ASMR Eyeshadow Tutorials

All your Mike Lindell news, who I believe still needs to #paythefuckup

Mike Lindell To Prove Machines Stoled Kari Lake’s Rightful Election Win. Again.

Nice Time!

Bernie Sanders Wants 32-Hour Work Week So We Can Become France.

I started yelling at Robyn in the chatcave, the reason the teachers sicked-out is so awful. DEVASTATING.

All 119 Teachers In Flint, Michigan, Called In Sick This Week And The Reason Will Devastate You!

Well, I mean.

James Lankford Censured For Doing One Decent Thing In His Miserable Legislative Career

Awful awful awful.

Perhaps James Crumbley Should Have Locked Up His Gun

Middle-aged sex even!

Fani Willis’s Trump Georgia RICO Case Back On Despite All The Sex

And with that, it’s time for a drink.

Welcome To Wonkette Happy Hour, With This Week’s Cocktail, The Irish Whiskey Sour!

Come see us over the weekend for whatever stories I can scrounge up! Love you bye!