One of the most fun things about Pride month is watching immaterial white conservatives having their cryfests about Pride, and about gay stuff in general. It bothers them so much!
We’ve had some bar in Idaho announcing “Heterosexual Awesomeness Month,” offering free beer to anyone who comes in dressed like a straight man. (Not sure if they’re checking cheap tighty-whities to verify skidmarks or what.)
There’s of course Martha-Ann Alito, wife of Samuel, threatening to fly SHAME FLAGS in ITALIAN that say “VERGOGNA!” in order to trigger the GAYS on the other side of the LAGOOOOOOON.
We guess they’re all upset with Ms. Rachel, a YouTube star for children, who said Happy Pride on her Instagram and TikTok (which are actually geared more toward the kids’ parents).
And now we have a fun little meltdown from one of the interchangeable Newsmax guys, Rob Schmitt. He’s threatening to leave the country over gay football. Poor guy.
The general story is that the Buffalo Bills have announced a National Gay Flag Football League sponsorship, bringing a team to Buffalo. On Instagram, the league said, “We are thrilled to bring inclusive flag football to Buffalo with the support of the Buffalo Bills. This exciting addition joins 27 other cities, and over 4,000 players, including straight allies, in the National Gay Flag Football League,” attributing the statement to NGFFL Commissioner Joel Horton.
So that’s neat. CNY Central, a local station out of Syracuse, explains that the gay flag football league started in 2002 — 20 years ago — and that there are 250 teams and 26 leagues. And they don’t discriminate against anybody. Even straight people are allowed to play, although they can only be 20 percent of any given team. (Cue the homophobes: WHAR’S OUR FOOTBALL TEAMS?)
Here is the screaming white dude from Newsmax with the histrionic panty-shitting meltdown:
“Finally, when you thought you could escape all the Pride Month propaganda by watching football, apparently not.”
If you thought that you’re an idiot, because it is not regular football season at all. Stupid.
“The Buffalo Bills is the latest NFL franchise supporting a new National. Gay. Flag. Football League! What?! Joining other NFL teams like the Giants, Commanders, and Seahawks? I, I, I literally just asked the producers. I was like, ‘Are we sure that this isn’t some kind of fake story from the Babylon Bee?’ There is a national gay flag football league now.”
Yes, since 2002, when Rob Schmitt was 19, according to Wikipedia.
Also, “Babylon Bee.” That’s it, that’s the punchline.
“Why? Why, is the question I ask so often in this country.”
Just to bother guys like Rob Schmitt.
“I need to go find my own country.”
Get the fuck out. You’re not adding anything of value to this one.
You may watch the whiny baby dick’s meltdown at Mediaite if you like. And if you want to see more bothered conservative weirdoes being bothered by this thing, check out Outsports.
Of course, you could also just skip that and keep on enjoying Pride month, secure in the knowledge that these people have so little of value happening in their hopeless dead-end lives that this is what they’re spending all their time screaming about.
We vote for that last option.
OPEN THREAD.
[Mediaite]
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