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File under “Nice fuckin’ grift if you can get it” and “These goddamned people” and “Wait is that legal?”
The New York Times (gift link) is reporting that a Trump super PAC literally paid Melon Trump to walk her fuckin’ ass downstairs at Mar-a-Lago, say a few words into the microphone, and walk her fuckin’ ass back upstairs.
That’s right. It was $155,000 American ameros, and it was for “speaking engagement.” Downfuckinstairs. At her own goddamn house.
BRB gonna go take a shit and do some shadow puppets on the wall while we’re there, PAY US. Read some Maggie Haberman while we’re gone:
A super PAC aligned with former President Donald J. Trump paid Melania Trump $155,000 in late 2021, an unusual payment that was not visible in the group’s initial federal reports and came to light only in a filing by Mr. Trump on Thursday.
The money was listed as pay for a “speaking engagement” by Ms. Trump in the new filing, a personal financial disclosure by Mr. Trump. The $155,000 payment was made in December 2021 by Make America Great Again, Again, which at the time was Mr. Trump’s leading super PAC.
Ms. Trump’s name, however, did not appear on the super PAC’s list of expenditures, which were made public last year.
There’s always that plot twist. There’s never not that plot twist.
Instead, the super PAC’s report showed two payments, for $125,000 and $30,000, to “Designer’s Management Agency,” which lists Ms. Trump as a client on its website.
Who among us does not occasionally go by the name “Designer’s Management Agency”?
So, the new filing lists it as $155,000, all together, to Melania Put On Some Motherfucking Underpants And Walked Downstairs Goddamned Incorporated, LLC. Or whatever her real name is. But the original filing lists it differently, as two payments for “event planning consulting,” per FEC records. We are just trying to keep up here.
Regardless, we can be sure the super PAC Make America Great Again Again Again Great Again Whole Buncha Times (MAGAAAAGAAGHAGHGAWBT) (or whatever) paid $155,000 to the wife of the guy who would announce about a year later that he was running for president again. We don’t want to go out on a limb and suggest the Trumps have a loving marriage or anything, but that does kind of sound to us like finding new and fun ways to grab some personal cash from your own super PAC.
Always be grifting! And then grift some more off your legal troubles! And then grift off your indictments!
But wait, we’re still stuck on whether this was for “speaking engagement” or for something else. Haberman and her writing buddy Shane Goldmacher report that the super PAC in question has folded and subsequently prairie dogged back up with a new name. But they quote an (anonymous) spox for the old super PAC who says the original $125,000 was paid to Melon’s “agency” for services rendered of “choosing tableware, arranging settings and picking floral arrangements,” and the remaining $30,000 for other shit.
So was it for “speaking engagement,” or it was for setting the table for some goddamned dinner the super PAC threw at Mar-a-Lago?
Whatever. For more on Melania’s grifting and Donald Trump’s grifting and their grifting together and their grifting in other people’s names, read the whole Habes.
These people are such tacky, classless trash, but we gotta say, we don’t feel one iota of sorry for the stupid morons they’re separating from their money.
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