But it’s important to remember that family is not one-size-fits-all, Shazam says, and only you can define what it means to you. Chosen family should include the people you can both laugh and cry with, who will lift you up no matter what, and, most of all, help you step into your truest self: “They should embrace all those beautiful facets of yourself that you may be scared to project onto the world, and teach you not to be scared to take up space and speak from your chest and your heart,” says Shazam. “That’s been a common thread amongst my family — and I strive to teach others the same thing.”