Compassion is your superpower for building and maintaining trust

Whenever we interview people asking about a boss or leader they trust the most, they always tell us about someone who cared about them when they needed it most.

In our ROCC of Trust model, caring or concern takes the longest to demonstrate, after demonstrating our reliability, openness/honesty, and competence. This is because we can do our jobs and do them well without necessarily showing much concern for others. We are getting the work done, but we are missing out on the benefits that come from others trusting us more deeply. As leaders, if we really want to cement that trusting relationship with our colleagues, employees, and others, compassion is our superpower. Theodore Roosevelt is credited with saying, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” This is especially true in times of crisis or significant external pressures on the team or organization when it is harder to take the time or make the effort to show others that we have their best interests at heart. This is also true when we are going through our own personal times of challenge. We appreciate a boss or leader who cares about our well-being.

At a minimum, when we trust someone to be caring or concerned about us, it means that we do not expect that person to take unfair advantage of us. Being trustworthy in this way means that we must be willing to take the time to understand another’s needs or interests. It also means that we must place the interests of others at a level equal to or above our own. This is typically the last aspect of trust we learn about in others or that others know about us, because the other elements of the ROCC of Trust are easier to demonstrate in terms of their time commitment, the effort required, or both. The caring aspect of trust might take longer to demonstrate as it is the most vulnerable aspect of how we lead through trustworthiness. Caring is valued so highly as an aspect of trust because it involves furthering others’ interests and not just our own. As a former General Motors plant manager and current Cleveland Clinic Trustee, Bob Lintz, told us many times, “You really have to be committed in your heart to doing what is right for the organization.”

In our research on trustworthy leadership, we outline four types of leaders; one stands out who focuses on building caring and compassionate relationships. The Coach values compassion and focuses on understanding people and helping them with their needs, concerns, and interests while disdaining others’ selfishness. They are able to contribute to a sense of security for their followers, fostering a greater shared sense of purpose among their teammates, and contributing to the norm of reciprocity within their organization. Their goals are forming relations with others, creating stronger team inclusion, and fostering greater commitment to the organization’s mission. Cleveland Clinic trustee Bob Lintz shared how he performed this role when he was a GM plant manager:

My coaching was intended not to dehumanize or embarrass people but, quite the contrary, to restore their faith in themselves and look for opportunities to grow if they felt they lacked support or did not believe they had the capability to do something. Whatever hardship they had, I always took the approach that, whatever they had to say, I was there to listen, not to judge. Together, we would work out the best approach towards finding the solution.

As Bob’s example illustrates, empathy does not have to lead to compassion, but compassion depends on empathy because understanding the situation another faces makes it easier to want to help if the situation calls for it. Ultimately, the best bosses show employees that they care about them and their careers as much as they care about their own.

Our mentor, Dr. Kim Cameron of the University of Michigan, found in his research that people develop themselves into positive leaders by modeling and encouraging acts of compassion, forgiveness, and gratitude. He also found that such leaders encourage other members of the organization to not only express gratitude and compassion in their relationships with others, but forgiveness as well.  Rebuilding trust is exceedingly difficult because although the offending party may apologize in an effort to restore broken trust, restoring the relationship requires the aggrieved party to be willing to forgive. In her work with Dr. Cameron, Dr. Emma Seppälä found that such positive cultures embrace compassion as a lubricant to help those who are struggling. In fact, positive leaders who offer compassion are able to build a resilient workforce, especially in times of crisis.

So, in addition to building trust with employees by showing you care, you also build a caring and resilient culture. When we asked Bob Lintz why he still spends so much time volunteering as a trustee of the Cleveland Clinic, Bob replied, “If they feel I’m contributing, I will continue to serve. I can’t stop caring.”

References:
McGregor, D. (1967). The professional manager. McGraw-Hill.
Cummings, L., & Bromiley, P. (1996). The organizational trust inventory (OTI): Development and validation. In R. Kramer, & T. Tyler (Eds.), Trust in organizations: Frontiers of theory and research (pp. 302–330). Sage.
Cameron, K. (2012). Positive leadership: Strategies for extraordinary performance (p. 22). Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
Cameron, K. (2012). Positive leadership: Strategies for extraordinary performance. Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
Seppälä, E., & Cameron, K. (2015). Proof that positive work cultures are more productive. Harvard Business Review, 12(1), 44–50.

Written by Dr. Aneil Mishra.

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