T
he good book recommends being slow to anger and slow to speak. While we are aware that’s the right way to live, some of us have become used to flying off the handle at the slightest provocation. This might not pose a threat if a person flares up occasionally at a random individual but when it becomes a behavioral problem, best believe you need to find efficacious ways to control your temper.
There are endless complications that could arise from being short-fused. It ranges from loss of properties to lives. Maureen, a licensed doctor, is a typical example of this truth. She had a rough marriage with a partner who matched her volatile anger with his passive aggression and occasional outbursts. In summary, she’s in jail for murder — she murdered her partner in cold blood during one of their numerous fights. Although becoming a murderer was never her intention, an ill temper charted the course of her life for the worse. You might think it’ll never be your case, but if you keep flaring up regularly with a temper as lethal as a larva, there’s no betting on your self-control either.
Check out practical ways to control your temper before it controls you…
#1. Mind your thoughts
When it comes to managing your temper, it starts with the mind. Take timeout to do some soul searching. This approach might help you figure out the deeper reasons behind your temper, and also enable you to deal with this flaw. Most times, we need to quiet the noise from outside, so we can be in tune with our inner selves.
#2. Speak to yourself
A therapist once convinced me that it’s possible to calm myself down. Prior to that, I thought this was impossible. She suggested having a mantra to help me realign and practice breathing techniques alongside. It could be something as simple as whispering “calm down.” The trick is to repeat the mantra as many times as possible until you regain your zen.
#3. Take a step out
Many of us can tell when a conversation or occurrence would aggravate us, but we keep going until we blow things out of proportion. Leaving a heated environment is one of the effective ways to control your temper. Sometimes when I feel the bubbles of anger welling up inside, I take a long walk. This helps me put things in perspective and is far more effective than always trying to “trash things out.”
#4. Write it out
Obviously, this works for me, but be assured that it also works for everyone else. Oftentimes, writing down your feelings and the rational manner you’d rather respond can be therapeutic. When you pen it down, it offers you time to reevaluate the situation.
#5. Repurpose the anger
When seeking ways to control your temper, consider redirecting the anger to something more positive. Looking for channels to let off the anger is more relatable than you think. For some, exercising or helping someone in need allows them to let the anger out, albeit in a healthy way. Also, pick up a creative habit like painting or knitting when you’re upset. It would surprise you how helpful this approach could be.
#6. Laugh, it’s medicine
Discovering ways to laugh it off is an effective anger killer. Watching funny online videos and rummaging through hilarious memes might be great ways to control your temper (at least they do right by me). Bottom line, find what/who makes you laugh to help pipe things down.
#7. Seek help
Angela realized her temper had spiraled out of control, and things might take a turn for the worse if she didn’t get help ASAP. Both verbal and physical outbursts had become her reflex. She would hit her partner before she even thought of a suitable response. All too often, she noticed her hands moved faster than her mind, and that’s a big issue. If you feel things are out of control, the best option is to seek help. A professional might help you become aware of the root cause, triggers, and serve as a healthy accountability partner.
Quotes on anger that might help change your perception
- “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” ~Buddha
- “When angry count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to one hundred.” ~Thomas Jefferson
- “In times of great stress or adversity, it’s always best to keep busy, to plow your anger and your energy into something positive.” ~Lee Laccoca
- “I shall allow no man to belittle my soul by making me hate him.” ~Booker T. Washington
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“When you are offended at any man’s fault, turn to yourself and study your own failings. Then you will forget your anger.” ~Epictetus
Featured image: npdesignde | iStock
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